I have always found life to be interesting.
I live my life the way I want.  I don't like to live by someone else's rules.
I like to be happy.  I hate people being sad.  I hate it more if it is because of me.  This is why I dont want to die.  I don't want people to be sad.
I don't want a funeral for two reasons.  The above one and the fact that I am not religious.
I have nothing against religion.  I just don't believe and don't think that other people have the right to make me want to believe.  I don't think that anyone has the right to force anyone to do anything.  I see it as rape.  For someone to force there beliefs on to me is the same thing.  People should be able to be left alone and not told that they are going to hell or whatever for being evil.

I don't do drugs other then alcohol (in moderation) and a panadol everynow and again.  I don't see the point.  I don't think that there is a need to use drugs to make yourself happy.  If you cannot be happy naturally then you have other problems you need to sort out.

I don't smoke.  I am asthmatic.  There is another drug I use to control it.  However I don't like the idea of being drug dependent even for something like this.  I rarely use it.  I use breathing control to keep my asthma in check.  However I do not recommend this to anyone unless they have dicussed it with their doctor.  Some people suffer with asthma worse then others do.

I drink when I feel a need.  That is if I feel like a drink or if it is socially expected of me.  However if I feel like I have had enough then I stop and don't care what people think.
My father is an alcoholic and so is his girlfriend.  My brother was one before he was 14.  I have no want to be like them.
I also don't see the point of getting drunk.  Sure I have done it (and enjoyed it) but I just don't see the point.  I also don't suffer from hangovers so that is not a consideration in case you are wondering.  There have been times that I have been very drunk and had a great time, and others that haven't been as good.

I am gay.  I don't apologise for this.  I am gay and proud of if.  I am not an activist though.
If people cannot accept the fact that I am gay that is their problem, NOT mine.
I don't need to be cured.  I don't need to be converted.  I don't need to be saved by the Lord.  I just need to be left alone.
I hate people assuming that I am hetrosexual.  A dumb thing really.  I am openly gay but not over the top.  I just don't think of people by their sexuality.  A person is a person, race, sex, age, looks, beliefs, brains etc do not come into it.
I have friends from all walks of life that accept me as I am even if they don't "approve" of it.  That is fine.
I also think that the sooner the people of the world think more along these lines we may have more peace in the world.  Yeah right!!!  I can see that happening in my lifetime.  NOT.

I believe in aliens.
I do not think we are alone in this universe.  The possibilities are endless.
Of course one of these possibilities is that we are alone but that seems silly to me.

I want to go into space.
Yes.  I want to travel to the stars, other planets anywhere up there.  If any one from NASA reads this please let me be on the manned space flight to Mars.  PLEASE.

I like to help people.  This would surprise some people that know me.  I act like I don't care sometimes.  And sometimes I don't.  The reason I like to help people is simple.  I think it is the right thing to do.  I am not a goody goody.  I am not some bleeding heart warm huggy person.  Trust me on this, I am not.  I just see that there is nothing wrong with helping people.  I am to help someone everyday.  No matter how small it is.

I am not warm and huggy.  I think that people know this now.
I think that there are a lot of problems in the world and a lot of people that could fix them if they wanted to.
Take the starving in africa (or anywhere) for example.  In Australia we had ads for people to send money to help these people.  I won't.  Why.  Because I think it is a waste of time.  A lot of relief efforts get held up by governments, sometimes literally.  Food may rot whilst people starve.
I see that we have two options:  Let people starve to death or change these governments.  It is usually easier to to the first one.
If we had a global thinking population we would like to help those starving.  Instead we (yes even me) just waste things daily.
If we shipped the left overs to the third world then we could help them.  We have surplus in just about everything but to ship it cost money.  Oh we can't have that now can we.  That just isn't profitable.
How often do we see the government doing something like building a new bridge or building when that money could go to helping the people that need it.
I realise that it is not this simple.  But perhaps it should be.  I am not saying that the world needs to be like one portrayed in Star Trek or something (however if you have a spare transporter I'll take it) but we need to do something to make the world a better place for us and our kids.

Saying the above I also think the government needs to cut costs.  We see many public services with overstaffed offices everyday.  And some of us work in them.  I do.  I know why people feel the way they do.
How often have you gone to do something and had to wait to be served while the people behind the counter just talk.  And sometimes you know that it isn't about work.  You can hear them.  I have done it myself.  Why??  Because we can.
In the last Australian Federal Election I voted Liberal.  I voted for their policies.  Even though it meant that the department I work for would get cut and then privatised and I may lose my job.
And what happens.  People at work complain.  "Oh they cannot do that" "Who would help them if we aren't here?"  "Oh we have lost so many people already."  Well maybe we needed to.
I have seen my department go through some changes and they have been for the better.  Now if people would just get over the "Public Service" attitude things would get better.  All I can say is roll on December 1st.

I would also point out that the government is not necessary doing things the right way.  I would like more information about what is going to happen to me in the future.  How about it guys.  Tell us something please.

I believe in euthanasia.  I do not see why people should suffer.  I would not want to.  If I was on a life support with little chance of coming out of it I don't see the point of wasting money and resourses.  Pull the plug on me now.
I also think I should be allow to choice if I want to die.  Not suicide, live is worth living for.  But if I were ill and faced a slow painful death then I would like to end it quickly.  It all comes back to me not wanting to see people sad.  People would suffer more if I lingered.  Get if over with quick and let them get on with living.

If you have read the other pages in this journal you know that I value friendship.  I have a small number of people that I would call Friends.  Enough to count on two hands.  I don't need anymore.  However that doesn't mean that I dislike people.  I just think that there is a difference between being friends and knowing people.  A Friend is someone I would trust with my life, or death if need be.

To finish off.  Keep smiling.  I know this page may be a bit bleak but things for me couldn't be better.
I have a wonderful husband.  A great family, great friends, great kids and a great house.
I love life and ask one thing:
Enjoy your life and don't waste it.  Do something special with everyday and help others.
But most of all, Be yourself.  It is the only person you need to be.

XOXOXOX

Wazsa